In recent years, the idea of giving-especially on Mondays-has intrigued me. We often think of Mondays as difficult, stressful days, which is why movements like Give Mondays and concepts like Blue Monday have caught my attention. They challenge the negative perceptions of this day by encouraging acts of kindness and generosity.
This post is a reflection on my personal journey with the idea of giving, how it evolved, and what it taught me about altruism, community, and, ultimately, about myself.
The Inspiration Behind the Project
I first came across this idea of purposeful giving through a TED Talk by Dan Pallotta, where he discusses our often skewed perspective on charity. He argues that too often, charities are judged on how little they spend, rather than the impact they have. This resonated with me because it highlighted that giving isn’t just about the size of the donation-it’s about the intention and the change it brings.
Then, in 2012, I was sent an article in the Daily Mail about a group of anonymous givers called Give Mondays. Their mission was simple: to brighten people’s days by handing out envelopes with small amounts of money, along with a note of encouragement. The randomness of it all struck me as beautiful. No fanfare, no expectation of thanks-just pure altruism (or was it i thought as i read the comment section).
[Article excerpt from Daily Mail on Give Mondays]
Blue Monday: Why It’s Considered the “Most Depressing Day”
Interestingly, the concept of Blue Monday-often labeled as the most depressing day of the year-ties into this idea of giving. The term Blue Monday originated in 2005 as part of a PR campaign by a UK travel company, but the sentiment behind it quickly spread. The third Monday in January is said to be when people feel the weight of post-holiday credit card bills, gloomy weather, and the pressure of failed New Year's resolutions.
[Wikipedia link on Blue Monday]
But Blue Monday can also be seen as an opportunity to break that negative cycle. Inspired by the combination of these two ideas-Blue Monday and Give Mondays-I began my own experiment with random acts of kindness.
Blue Monday: Why It’s Considered the “Most Depressing Day”
Interestingly, the concept of Blue Monday-often labeled as the most depressing day of the year-ties into this idea of giving. The term Blue Monday originated in 2005 as part of a PR campaign by a UK travel company, but the sentiment behind it quickly spread. The third Monday in January is said to be when people feel the weight of post-holiday credit card bills, gloomy weather, and the pressure of failed New Year’s resolutions.
[Wikipedia link on Blue Monday]
But Blue Monday can also be seen as an opportunity to break that negative cycle. Inspired by the combination of these two ideas-Blue Monday and Give Mondays-I began my own experiment with random acts of kindness.
My Take on Giving: The Coffee Card Experiment
Initially, I felt drawn to the anonymity of the Give Mondays group. I liked the idea of leaving small sums of money for strangers to find and brighten their day. But as I started participating in these acts of kindness, I found it hard to connect with the process. The anonymity, which is often seen as a virtue in giving, didn’t resonate with me as much as I had hoped.
I wanted a more personal touch. So instead of leaving money, I began purchasing Starbucks gift cards and writing short, heartfelt anonymous notes to go along with them. The idea was simple: I wasn’t giving enough to change someone’s life, but enough to offer them a moment of reflection-a quiet coffee break where they could think about their goals, their day, or simply enjoy a small treat.
I’m totally aware that giving with intent contradicts what Dan Pallotta discusses in his TED Talk, but for me, the idea of leaving cash just didn’t feel right. Maybe it was because I was giving to people, not charities, and they hadn’t asked for the money. Was that different?
The act of handing over the card, saying, “This is for you-enjoy,” and then walking away was both exhilarating and nerve-wracking. I found myself overthinking: Who should I give it to? Should it be someone who looks like they’re struggling? Or should it be someone who seems successful, but could still use a little kindness?
I eventually added a bit of randomness to the process-sometimes choosing the person closest to me after closing my eyes for 15 seconds, or simply following an instinct. But every time I did this, it was a unique experience, one that made me reflect on my own motives and feelings.
Community and the Shared Experience of Giving
As I reflect on the Give Mondays initiative, I realise that it’s not just about giving to strangers-it’s about the community we all share. Whether we live in London, Amsterdam, or New York, we’re all part of the same fabric. We share the same public transport, the same roads, the same city. Even though we often walk past each other as strangers, we’re all living side by side in these vibrant, interconnected spaces.
We’re all part of these places for similar reasons, driven by similar hopes. Whether we work in the city or commute from the outskirts, we’re working to build our lives, earn our livelihoods, and contribute to our communities.
Give Mondays is a small yet powerful example of how random connections between strangers can spark joy and kindness in the most unexpected ways. We are all connected in ways we might not even realise, and by giving to someone else, we’re acknowledging that shared connection. (or I was at least)
Just knowing that if someone gave to me, it would bring happiness into my life, made me want to share that feeling with others. In a city full of strangers, sometimes the simplest act of giving can create a sense of unity and shared humanity.
PEOPLEAREPEOPLE
The Complex Nature of Altruism
One of the most interesting lessons from this experiment was confronting the uncomfortable truth about altruism: it’s not always purely selfless. Every time I gave, I felt a deep sense of satisfaction-almost as if I were getting more than I was giving. As Dan Pallotta mentions in his TED Talk, giving often has strings attached. It’s hard to separate our need for recognition or validation from the act of generosity.
In a way, the anonymity of the Give Mondays initiative could have been a way to avoid these feelings, but for me, the personal interaction-the exchange-made the act of giving more meaningful, even if it made me more aware of my own motivations.
What I Learned
The project of giving away gift cards and participating in random acts of kindness lasted for a few years, but the impact it had on me is lasting. It taught me that giving, in any form, is a complex process. It involves not just the receiver, but the giver’s mindset as well.
Looking back, I realize that the most important part of giving is not the size of the gift or the person you choose-it’s the intention behind it. Whether you’re giving money, time, or even just a smile, it’s the thought and effort that count.
How You Can Start Giving
We can all start small. You don’t need to wait for the next Blue Monday to brighten someone’s day. Whether it’s through random acts of kindness, donating to charity, or simply offering your time, each small act of giving can make a difference-not just for the person receiving it, but for you as well.
One of my favorite books is Random Acts Of Kindness: 365 Ways to Make the World a Nicer Place. I have a few copies on my desk, so if you’d like one, let me know, and I’ll send it to you-or you can get a copy on Amazon:
And if you’re feeling inspired by this, I encourage you to think about starting your own version of Give Mondays. Grab a coffee, reflect, and take a step toward making someone else’s Monday a little brighter.
Finally
The idea of Give Mondays is a reminder that even in the most mundane, challenging times, a small act of kindness can shift someone’s entire perspective. In a world where Mondays are often seen as a drag, why not flip the script and turn them into a day of positivity and giving?
